The “Dirty Harry” Drive
One of the most unforgettable deer hunts I’ve ever witnessed occurred on Thanksgiving Day 1997. It was a fiasco for the ages that included five hunters, a wounded buck, a wet swamp, and an uncle who decided he wanted to be “Dirty Harry” for a day. Up until that memorable afternoon, the 1997 gun season had been quite uneventful. Deer sightings seemed to be down and there just hadn’t been much “action”. Back then it was family tradition to have a large gathering for Thanksgiving and that meant all deer hunters came out of the woods at dinner time. The feast that year was excellent, as always, and the scene afterwards was of deer hunters scattered about the living room in various positions of relaxation watching football on TV. Which is where we probably should have stayed…but didn’t!
After about an hour of watching football someone had the not-so-brilliant idea of going back out hunting as a group. After much hesitation five hunters threw on their blaze orange and headed for the woods. The group consisted of Uncle Jerry, Cousin Chad, Cousin-In-Law Jim, Myself and Uncle Pablo...who, as you will soon find out, is the main subject of this story. A plan was devised to conduct a good old fashioned deer drive in an area that holds lot’s of deer but is too thick to stand hunt, thus making it ideal for pushes. This particular operation would have three hunters making the drive to two standers at the north end …next to a huge swamp. The drive worked perfectly and resulted in Jim dropping a nice doe with a “hail mary” butt shot. He also shot at a buck that came sprinting out of the drive. We knew he hit it because a light blood trail was found heading directly into the huge swamp. The group then split up to track down the buck while Jim performed gutting surgery on the doe. Uncle Pablo and I picked up the blood trail and followed it into the big swamp while Jerry and Chad went to the east in hopes of cutting off any escape routes the buck may try to use. It was at this point that all things normal came to a screeching halt.
Maybe because it was Thanksgiving, or because he wanted to make an uneventful season more interesting, or maybe just because he’s Uncle Pablo, but for whatever the reason, he was carrying a “Dirty Harry” looking 44 pistol (with a really long barrel) instead of a traditional deer rifle. It was big and bad looking! I knew right away there was going to be trouble because as we walked along he chose to carry the big “hog leg” in his hand instead of holstering it. Now, if we had been on flat dry land there wouldn’t have been an issue but we were trudging through a soggy swamp of crotch deep grass and clumps of brush…anything but easy walking terrain. Couple that with Uncle Pablo’s not so graceful stride and you end up with a loaded revolver being waved erratically through the air with every step…and one very concerned nephew. I did my best to focus on the task at hand while bobbing and weaving to avoid “Dirty Harry’s” gun barrel but I was consumed with the hope of this chase being over soon. No such luck.
After a few hundred yards of “sloshing” along the blood trail, Uncle Pablo and I “stumbled” upon a couple of islands in the swamp. These islands are a small oasis of high ground and mature trees where deer like to bed. Sure enough, we got half way onto the first island when the wounded buck jumped up and took off running across open swamp toward the next island. Pablo immediately yelled “there he is!” and sprinted (I use the term loosely) across that island as fast as he could go towards the open swamp. For my own well being I stayed a safe distance behind him. What happened next is probably the funniest thing I’ve ever seen in the deer woods. Pablo hit the swamp running wide open and started shooting his big pistol towards the fleeing buck. For a few tense moments there were arms, legs, and bullets flying all over that swamp. His gun was swinging frantically through the air like an unattended fire hose as he scrambled to stay on his feet…but he kept shooting anyway! His legs just couldn’t keep up with his trigger finger as the swamp began to swallow him up! Even after the buck disappeared from sight Pablo continued stumbling and shooting wildly until all his bullets were gone. It was at this point that I lost it and started to laugh hysterically. He turned to look back at me and said excitedly “I think I hit him”…to which I responded with more uncontrollable laughter. After both of us re-gained our composure we once again took up the chase.
It wasn’t long after Pablo’s spectacular shooting display that we heard more shots coming from the swamp. After listening intently we continued walking for a short distance when suddenly there was the buck… standing broadside only 50 yards away! It must have fled the “Dirty Harry” scene, ran within range of my cousin Chad, who was able to unload his gun at the unfortunate beast, then turned and came right back to us. We couldn’t believe it! I immediately took aim with my .270 and fired. I swore I hit him but the buck didn’t move. He just stood there with steam coming out of all the bullet holes he had in him. Pablo hollered “You Missed Him!!” and once again opened fire with his now re-loaded “smoke-wagon”. I managed to fire off one last parting shot as well. The buck crashed off into the swamp and finally collapsed a short distance away. Uncle Pablo ran up and shot it one more time with his hand held cannon to finish the job. The group of hunters quickly assembled around the fine six point buck as it lay dead on a heavily used deer trail in the swamp. Everyone was talking and sharing their version of the hunt when suddenly Pablo pulled out his pistol and fired yet another shot into the buck. The rest of us jumped back out of fear then asked him what the heck he was doing shooting at a deer that was already dead. He claimed the buck was looking at him while we were all gathered around talking…which made for a very good laugh and lots of joking about Pablo’s itchy trigger finger. A final count revealed nine bullet holes in the buck...I think Dirty Harry himself would have been proud!
